“Chad?”

Something in her tone put Chad on alert.  “What’s wrong?”

“I’m at the corner of,” she paused looking at street names.  “Sixth Avenue and California.  I see a bank building, a big office building of some kind, and Starbucks- it says coffee.”

“Ok… um, are you ready for mom to come get you?”  Unsure of why she was half a mile from the tearoom, he went with a safe question.

A sniffle alarmed him.  “Um, do you think she’d mind if we went later or tomorrow or next year?”  Her tone grew strained and pained.

“I’m on my way.  Go inside Starbucks, order a Caramel Macchiato or one of those Peppermint Mocha things and I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“Ok,” her voice sounded frighteningly small.  “Hurry Chad.  I want to go home.”

Chad was in his truck and on his way before she hung up the phone.  He punched his mother’s cell number and waited impatiently for her to pick up.  “Mom?”

“Yeah?”

“First, pray.  Something went wrong with the meeting.  Willow is a mess.  She’s asking to go home and the Willow I know would have just gotten on the subway and gone home.  She wouldn’t call for help.”

“Well maybe she didn’t know where the subway station is.  It’s probably nothing-”

“She was downtown in the financial district.”

The hair on Marianne’s neck stood at alert attention.  “Did she say where?”

“Sixth and California.”

Marianne reached her car door tossing her own Starbucks cup in a nearby trashcan, and leaned heavily against the car.  “That’s near the Solari building.”  She heard squeals over the phone and replaced her mother hat.  “Chad.  Slow down now.  She’s fine.  She called.  Send her to the Starbucks-”

“Already did.”

“That’s my boy.  Bring her home.  Don’t let her go home if you can stop her.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Oh Chad,” she added as an afterthought.

“Yes?”

“Happy Birthday son.”

***

“Chad said to get a Caramel Machiavelli or something with Peppermint.  What do you suggest?”

“You’ve never had Starbucks?”

“I’ve never had coffee,” Willow admitted with a feeble attempt at a smile.

“I’d get the Peppermint Mocha Grande.  The chocolate and peppermint give it a nice smooth and mild but refreshing flavor.”

The counter girl sounded like an advertisement.  Once mixed and ready, a young man Willow’s age called it out from the other end of the counter.  “Have a nice day.”

She sipped the coffee, burning her tongue twice.  At first, the bitterness of the coffee overshadowed the flavor of the chocolate and peppermint but once her taste buds adjusted; she inhaled the rich steamy scents and finished the coffee with relish.  A glance at her watch showed a whopping ten minutes had passed.  Surely, Chad couldn’t get all the way from his house to her in less than fifteen or twenty minutes- not with all the downtown traffic.

She brought her cup back to the counter and ordered another coffee.  To her dismay and irritation, the girl behind the counter tossed her cup and accepted her money.  “I take it you liked it?”

“It was very good.  I didn’t think I was going to- it was a little bitter at first but then it got better.”  She paused.  “I didn’t need a new cup.  The other one was fine…”

“We have to use a fresh cup.  Health regulations.”

At her seat, she once again sipped at the coffee while watching the pedestrians on their way to undisclosed places and trying to forget her morning.  Solari had been difficult but a necessary step.  She wanted to ensure that the man was permanently out of her life and thought that the easiest way of removing him was to face him.  Now she wasn’t so sure.  He hadn’t been menacing or frightening- he seemed almost pathetic in his eagerness to forge a relationship.

Grandmother Finley, however, had been much more emotionally difficult than Willow had imagined.  Lost in thought and memories, she didn’t notice when Chad strode into the coffee shop and pulled another chair next to her table.  “Willow?”

“Oh Chad, you got here fast.”

“Traffic was on my side,” he explained brushing aside unhelpful commentary. “What’s wrong?”

“I want to go home.”

“Mom’s house is empty.  Let’s go there.  It’s closer.”

How he managed it, Chad didn’t know, but he got her to the truck, across town, onto the loop, and to his house in half the time he should have spent.  Before he went into the house, Chad sent his mother a text message asking her to give them an hour before she came home.

Marianne read the message with a small smile on her lips.  “Home.  Willow too.  Need hour w her if poss.  Thanks.  Love you.”

“Thirsty?”

“I had all that coffee but I want water.  I feel jittery.”

Willow’s words were spoken at the speed of light.  Her hands twitched, her eyes roamed, and she seemed to shake her head now and then giving her the appearance of one with Parkinson’s disease.  “Um Willow, what did you order?”

“Peppermintcoffeelikeyousaid.  It was goodtoo.”

“Wow.  You’re sensitive to caffeine I guess.”

“I hope not,” she confessed.  “Ihadtwoofthem.”

Chad’s mind raced.  If drunks needed coffee to counter the effects of alcohol, what did you give people for caffeine?  He handed her a tall glass of water, sliced a chunk of cheese, and pushed her to eat not knowing if it’d have any effect on her at all.  “Tell me about Starbucks.  How did you get way down there?”

“I took Mr. Solari his check.”

“I see.”  He didn’t see, actually, but he did realize that his natural tendency to blast her for putting herself in a painful and vulnerable position wasn’t going to do a lot of good and would probably irritate her more anything especially in her hyper caffeine-induced agitated state.

“He’s a small pathetic little man.  It was a little embarrassing.”

“Embarrassing?  How?”  Embarrassing wasn’t the word he’d expected.

“To think that I’m related- that I share genes and DNA with a man like that- little minded and self-seeking.  It was disgusting.  I felt dirty just being in there.”

“Solari is a powerful man Willow.”

Finishing her water in a single swallow, Willow refilled it and handed it to Chad.  “Excuse me.”

The effects of the coffee were already evident.  Chad took the water to the living room and set it on the coffee table in front of the couch.  While he waited, he glanced over his living room and noticing changes since he’d been a child at Christmas.  The advent calendar was gone.  In its place on the mantel was a Christmas pyramid.  His mother had always wanted one but didn’t like the idea of candles and boys shoving and pushing through the house.  He could almost hear her voice, “Take it downstairs boys!”

The stockings were missing and replaced by swags of evergreen, white lights, and silver bells with deep blue bows.  As he thought about it, he remembered that the swag had been there last year as well.  The coffee table held a large holly arrangement with pinecones and candles.  His childhood home was as different from what he remembered, as Willow’s was the same.

When Willow reentered, Chad patted the sofa next to him.  “Come talk to me.  I’m a little concerned.”

“It was awful Chad.  Those people, my grandparents, they’re still hurting.  Mother hurt them so badly when she left and I felt like I should apologize for her but I know she made the best decision she could with the information she had and I-”

Chad hushed her as she plunged into an explanation of her perception of things.  “Woah there.  Just take a deep breath.  No one blames you for any decisions, right or wrong, that your mother made.”

“I think they do.  If I didn’t exist-” She jumped to her feet pacing the floor and ranting.  “I should never have contacted them about mother in the first place.  I should have known that it’d be reopening wounds.  I was insensitive and selfish and-”

The sudden urge to kiss her into silence both shocked and amused him.  “Been tortured with too many chick flicks thanks to Cheri,” he thought to himself.  “She’s like a sister and you wouldn’t exactly kiss Cheri like that and anyway, she’d consider it a whipping to have ‘smashed lips’ at a time like this.”   Aloud, and unaware he was actually speaking, he muttered a stern lecture to himself, “You’ve got to get people’s opinions out of your head and stop letting them dictate your thoughts and actions.”

“You’re right. I know you are.  But the things I said are true too.”

“I’m what?  What exactly did I say?”  Panic filled his heart.  Had he really spoken aloud?  What if he’d said-

“You’re right.  I am letting other people’s opinions have too much control over me.”  She peered at him closely.  “You didn’t know what you were saying?”

“I didn’t know I said it aloud,” he confessed and praised the Lord’s mercy in not letting him have said any more.

“What else are you thinking but not saying then,” she retorted glaring.  “If you have opinions, why not share them like the rest of the world!  I can’t believe this!”

“I’m not the enemy Willow.”  His quiet reminder hushed her.  “I often think things that I don’t share.  My opinion is just my opinion.  I have no obligation to share it and you have no obligation to heed it if I do so don’t attack me because you’re feeling badly.  I’m not the enemy here.”

Willow simultaneously burst into tears and a fit of giggles.  Chad stood in shocked amazement as she wiped frantically at the streams of tears pouring down her cheeks and tittered about how silly she was.  Marianne walked into the room in the middle of it and promptly asked, “Is she drunk?”

This sent both Chad and Willow into fits of hysterics- Willows punctuated with the occasional sob. “She’s on her first caffeine high and it’s a Dussie.  Two Peppermint Mocha’s in a row.”

“Oh honestly Chad!”

“See, now I got you in trouble with your mom.  I swear today-”

Chad tried a new tactic.  “You’re right.  You really should have thought of these things.  You should have known that you’d cause pain to these people but you went anyway.”  Marianne and Willow stared at him in utter amazement but Chad continued as seriously as if he was rebuking a naughty child.  “I think you owe everyone an apology for your existence and for how you’ve ruined theirs with your presence.  You’re nothing but a burden to everyone around you.  I think we’d all be better off if you would just go back to your farm and stay there.  Your mother had the right idea.  You’re not meant for socializing.”

“Chadwick Elliot Tesdall!”

“Mom!”

Willow’s attempt to control her laughter failed.  “Cha- Chad- Your face.”

“I cannot believe you’d be so insensitive- even in jest.  I taught you better than that.”

“He’s right Marianne,” Willow began.  “He’s right.  I’m being self-centered.”

Shaking his head, Chad tried again.  “No, that’s not the point I was trying to make.  I was trying to point out that everyone is so wrapped up in their own hurts and grieves they don’t realize the pressure they and you are putting on you.”

Marianne drew Willow to the couch and pulled her down next to her.  “Listen, Chaddie’s right.  We’re here to support you.  You’re not alone.  You’re not at fault for things you had no say in.  You’re just another one hurt by a string of events that began with a crime.  If you have anything blameworthy, it’d be the crime of innocence.  Last I heard that’s not even a misdemeanor.”

She pointed to the stairs.  “Now get your tiny fanny up those stairs and put on your jeans.  Chad’s taking you to the park for a while.  I want you to keep him there until five o’clock and then make him bring you back.  If you get cold, go to the mall or something.”

“Why mom?  I thought you’d want help with dinner or something-”

“Because I want you out of here while I decorate.  She’s the only one who you’ll listen to now.”

***

“It’s a nice park, Willow admitted.  She unwrapped her ruana from around her shoulders and grabbed the coat Marianne had sent.  “How about a snowball race?”

“Dare I ask?”

“What do you mean?”

He grabbed a spare hat from his pocket and pulled it down on Willow’s head.  “Can’t have frost bitten ears.  Mom’d kill me.  I mean,” He explained, “That you Finleys do not do anything um, normal.  I have a feeling this is going to be a complicated race.”

“It’s a race and a fight combined.  We pick a destination, find a route to it with some cover for each, pace off like in old western movies Mother told me about, and then it’s a race to the target.”

“So where do snowballs come in?”

Her grin was nearly wicked.  “The advantage.  You throw snowballs.  You hit the other person and they take three paces back while you count to five.  You can be moving forward on five but you can’t throw before five.”

“You’re on.  We race to the truck from the other side of the park.  That way you know where you’re going and we’re on even footing.”

“You should have kept your advantage.  I’m going to stomp you,” Willow threatened.

Hand in hand, they started across the park.  “Willow?”

“Hmm?”  Her mind was fully engaged in strategy to give her an edge.

“I’m sorry for being so harsh with you.  I didn’t know how else to get you to see it but-” he swallowed.  “It was cruel.”

“It’s what I needed to hear.  You proved yourself a faithful friend Chad.  I consider myself blessed.”

For several minutes they walked, their feet crunching the snow beneath them and saying nothing.  At the east entrance of the park, Chad took a deep breath.  “Well, I really hated to do that and now I hate it more than I did at home.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m about to destroy you with snowballs.”

She turned her back to him.  Feeling terrible, he whirled her around to face him again and said penitently, “I was just-”

“Are you going to count or am I?”

Grinning wickedly, he turned his back on her and started counting.  “One, two, three, four-” He took the largest steps he could manage knowing he could likely throw a snowball farther.  “-fourteen, fifteen, sixteen.”  Grumbling, he walked around a bench wasting perfectly good steps.  “-twenty-two, twenty-three-” Realizing the advantage of the bench, he took smaller steps.  “Twenty-nine… thirty!”

The game commenced in an explosion of flying snowballs.  Willow had scooped balls as she stepped away from him and carried them with her as she walked.  On ‘thirty’, she whirled and fired, one after the other hitting Chad with three of them.  She ran ahead as he took his backward steps.

“I’ll get you for that!”

“Gotta catch me first.”

While Willow raced through the park.  Her agility gave her an edge but Chad’s willingness to dive for cover while throwing balls, kept the playing field nearly level.  Across the park they sped, Chad in the lead and then Willow.  People paused and watched as they dodged, retraced steps, and threw.

The truck was in sight.  Chad knew if he could reach it first, she’d demand a rematch and they had another couple of hours to kill.  Hiding behind a tree, he watched her movements to see if she looked cold or tired.  He wasn’t willing to ‘let her win’ but if a risk put him out of the game and made her more comfortable, then so be it.

Her cheeks were rosy, her breath he could see in regular puffs but she was clearly not gasping for air.  He noticed a few kids watching the game and made up his mind.  Jumping from behind the tree, he threw several snowballs in her direction and raced for the truck.  Willow dodged all the balls and tore after him pelting the truck, the air, and finally Chad at the very second he hit the truck.  Instinctively he raced back three steps and dove for the bumper barely touching it before her.

“I win!”

“Why did you back up?”

“You got me as I hit the truck.  I didn’t know the rules so I didn’t take a chance.”

“I demand a rematch,” she ordered in mock disgust.

Chad draped an arm around her shoulder and led her to the crowd of young spectators.  “I have an idea…”

***

“Boy Lance was good!  I couldn’t dodge his balls to save my life!”

Willow still chattered about the game as they strolled up the walk of the Tesdall home.  As Chad opened the door, the entire Tesdall clan and Chuck Majors shouted, “Surprise!”

“Um- Surprise?”  Chad’s expression was priceless.

“What else do you say when your guest of honor shows up for his party.  Get with the program,” Marianne chided as she bustled them into the house.  “Willow, you get up there and change into something warm and dry.”

Nothing Marianne could have said would have made Willow feel more at home than those words.  She hugged the confused woman and hurried up the stairs to obey.  Marianne stared at her son.  “What-”

“This is Willow mom.  Who knows?”

Dinner was delicious and the cheesecake, complete with twenty-six candles, was divine.  As Willow and Cheri helped carry plates into the kitchen, she overheard a remark made by Chuck.  “Excuse me, Chuck, come here please.”

Willow pulled Chuck from the dining room into the living room, saw Chad and his father, and dragged Chuck down the basement steps.  Chad’s face was a study in confusion and anticipation.  “I’m not sure what’s up, but this is gonna be good.”  Occasionally they heard snippets of raised voices, mostly Chuck’s, but not enough to be sure of the point of Willow’s indignation.

Chuck, on the other hand, was irritated.  “I don’t get what your problem is Willow!  It was a compliment.”

“Would you have said it to her face?”

“Well, yeah- no- well before you started messing with my head maybe I would.”

Willow’s eyes flashed.  “Excuse me but before I was ‘messing with your head’ people avoided your crass self-centered nonsense.  I’m sorry I was so mean as to assume you could rise above that.”

“I don’t get what the problem is.  Why is ok for me to compliment her hair or clothes but I’m supposed to pretend that I don’t know she has a fine set of-”

His retort was met with silence.  Rather than argue the point, Willow glared at him waiting for his senses to return.  Instead, Chuck grew more belligerent until Willow tried a new tactic.

“So what’s wrong with mine?”

“What?”

“Well if it is such an acceptable practice to comment on the size, shape, or in any other way admire a woman’s breasts, why ignore mine?  I believe you’ve mentioned that you like my hair, I’m not too tall or too short, oh, and I have nice eyes if I remember.  I also seem to recall something about needing my teeth whitened.  So, you’ve fairly thoroughly assessed my assets, why not my breasts, buttocks, and legs while you’re at it?”

“Well, it’s not something to say to a girl-”

Satisfied that she’d tripped him up, Willow crossed her arms and glared at him.  “But I believe you said that before I meddled with your fine social skills, you would have.”

“Well I wouldn’t have said anything to your face-”

“Oh,” she began patronizingly.  “I see.  You do have some scruples.  You’ll compliment a girl behind her back- even on her behind!  But you won’t be upfront with her.”

“Some girls don’t see the compliment-”

Willow took a step closer and practically shook him.  “That’s because it isn’t.  Cheri likes you.  If you treat her like you did me at first and she’ll toss you out on your ear if her brothers don’t beat her to it.  For that matter, I might beat them all.”

“I-”

“Are you going to try to defend yourself again?”

Chuck nodded.  “I wasn’t trying to be insulting.  All guys talk about girls.  Even Chad probably-”

“Chad!” Willow called interrupting him once more.

Chad’s feet thundered down the steps.  “What?”

“Chuck informs me that it is common practice for men to discuss different women and their physical attributes when in strictly male company.  Is this true?”

Blushing, Chad shuffled his feet.  He’d never thought about how it might sound out of Willow’s mouth, but every man he knew spoke appreciatively of women when in male company.  “Well-”

“See!” Chuck cried like a child who found a co-culprit in a naughty escapade.

The disappointment on Willow’s face was keen.  “I see.  I’m curious.  What was the consensus on me?  Do the officers think my legs pass muster?  Is my backside too round or too flat?  Are my breasts too disproportionate to the rest of my body?  I’m disgusted!”

She whirled to retreat up the stairs but Chad grabbed her arm.  “Willow, I’ve never- I mean we- the guys at the station- none of us, at least when I’m around, ever-”

“You just said-”

Chuck’s head swung from side to side watching their expressions change interestedly.  “You asked if we discussed women’s attributes.  I thought you meant if we thought they were pretty or had nice hair or something.  I can see Martinez being more crass about his assessments but they all know I’d stomp ‘em if they talked about a woman like that in my presence.  Joe would too.  And I don’t want to think of what Judith would do to any of us if she found us-”

“Come on Chad,” Chuck began defensively.  “You know you do it.  Every guy does.  We appreciate a fine body.  God made us that way and He made women the way they are so we could appreciate them.  It’s in the Bible!”

“Not the way you’ve twisted it isn’t,” Chad began.  Then understanding dawned.  “What’d you say about Willow,” he growled.

“Nothing-”

“If you insulted my sister-”

“It was a compliment!  I’ve been trying to tell her than for the past ten minutes!”

Turning to Willow, Chad asked, “What did he say?”

“Ask Chris.  He heard it.”  Willow’s mind was still reeling.  Why was Chuck not seeing the problem?

“Chris!”

“Great, the whole house will be down here before long,” Chuck muttered belligerently again.

“If you did nothing wrong, Chuck,” Willow began.  “Then there shouldn’t be any reason for them not to come.”

“People assume the worst about me.  Even when I’m innocent, I’m guilty.”

Amazed, Chad watched as Willow wrapped her arms around him briefly and said, “Maybe because you’re guilty often enough that they forget you can do something right too.”

“What?”

“Chris, can you tell us exactly what Chuck said to you?”

“I didn’t hear.  He mumbled something but I wasn’t paying attention,” he admitted.

Chris and Chad looked expectantly at Willow.  “Well,” Chad asked.

“Ask him.  I feel icky enough without repeating it.”

“It’s not icky!” Chuck protested.

“Then you won’t mind telling her brothers now.  After all, you said it to Chris in the first place.”

Shaking his head, Chuck moved toward the stairs.  “I didn’t mean for it to be icky but you’re making it icky.  I’ll just go.”

As Chuck’s foot hit the first step, Chad’s quiet voice stopped him.  “My sister likes you Majors.  I don’t know why, but she does.  If you hurt her, either by being inappropriate, or crass, or by walking out and leaving her to wonder what she did wrong when she did nothing wrong, you’ll regret it.  Don’t make that mistake.”

“Right.”

Chris, Chad, and Willow stood exchanging concerned glances as Chuck reached the top of the stairs and called out for Cheri.  Chris caught a look in Chad’s eye and excused himself muttering something about checking on Cheri.  Willow leaned against the ping-pong table and returned Chad’s miserable gaze.

“I’m sorry Chad.  On your birthday too.  I shouldn’t have stepped in. It wasn’t any of my business.”

“You tried to help a brother in Christ.”

“But did I beat him up with the log from my own eye in doing it?” she asked as she sank to the floor exhausted.

Chad sat next to her, wanting to comfort her and yet feeling awkward at the same time.  “Willow, I can’t see you confronting a situation like that unless you did it out of love.  Just what did he-”

“I can see that he tried to be complimentary in his gauche way but I just knew, instinctively because Mother certainly never said anything about it, that it was wrong. Terribly wrong.  And I can see that he admires Cheri.  You said she flirted with him so she must see something in him but if he said anything like that to her I think she’d kill him.”

A deep chuckle escaped before Chad could stop it.  “She’d have to beat Chris and me.  And dad,” he added as an afterthought.  “Not necessarily in that order.”

“So if you don’t talk about stuff like that, why did you look so embarrassed?”

“I don’t know,” Chad admitted.  “Suddenly it seemed vulgar to talk about women at all.  I was probably feeling tainted by the realization that Chuck had said something about women that insulted you and I’d never want to do that…”

As Marianne’s voice called them upstairs, Willow stood and grinned at Chad.  “So, did I ever come up in those conversations?”

“What conversations?”  Chad stalled thinking frantically.

“Oh, about whether this girl or that is pretty?  What was the consensus on me?  I’ve never been able to decide.”

“If you’re pretty!  What a joke.”

She nodded thoughtfully.  ”Yeah.  I always thought Mother was beautiful and I don’t look anywhere that nice.  Bill agreed.  I forgot about that.”

“You’re joking right?” Chad protested.

“Why?”

“Get upstairs girl!  Of course, you’re pretty.  I swear; girls are the most aggravating creatures on the planet.”

“Chad!” Cheri’s voice called from the top of the stairs.  “Quit flirting down there and get up here and open your presents!”

Willow cocked an eyebrow at Chad as she started up the steps.  “Flirting?”